“Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.”
Self-acceptance is a pretty common challenge. More than you might think. We spend lots of our time and resources to fit into a group. We want to feel accepted, that we belong to a place we can call home.
From that knowledge, it is easier to understand why we pay attention to what people say about us, why we worry about our looks, or we feel overwhelmed when meeting new people. Everyone feels this way, but not everyone feels it with the same intensity.
In any case, there is an antidote to cast away the overwhelming feeling coming from the fear of not being accepted: self-acceptance. And that’s why is a challenge everyone must face. Accepting yourself is not easy, but it can help you save money. Hang on, and discover why.
What we do to feel accepted
We do many things. We try to fix our bodies, learn new ideas, find ourselves in people-pleasing activities, etc. When the need of feeling accepted is so strong, we even end up giving up ourselves, we betray ourselves!
People do this all the time. You may have seen women falling into rigid diets to fit into a standard of beauty. It also happens that women waste lots of time and money to look great, to meet a standard of beauty, and, in the end, they won’t feel good about it because it is not stemming from who they are!
Clothes are a classic example that applies to everyone. People will judge us based on what we wear. Because of that, we worry too much about what’s in our wardrobe and what we will put on for that special occasion.
As with everything, taking care of ourselves is healthy. The key behind this is asking ourselves why am I doing this? Am I doing this out of fear or because I feel good about it? It is not healthy when we do it to please someone else.
How to tell if we are doing the right thing?
Talk with yourself! You are the only one to know that!
Imagine yourself doing something like shaping your body, wearing that pink jacket, using yellowish shoes, learning something new, going to that party, staying alone at home, whatever. Do you feel good about it? Then go ahead with that!
That’s how you know it is the right thing: you feel good about it and you are not harming anyone by doing it. Yes, you might feel embarrassed or out of place. It doesn’t matter.
As time goes by, you will accept the fact that people will gossip about you, pay attention to you or even tell you things you don’t like. It’s ok. You know who you are and you are giving yourself permission to express it and live with it.
What about the saving money part?
Well, when we practice self-acceptance, we don’t need to wear the newest clothes, the latest device, or an expensive watch to feel that we belong. When we accept ourselves as we are, we don’t feel the urge to change anything to please someone else.
This doesn’t mean we are not open to change. We want to change, and we will change, not because someone else says so. Instead, we work on our temperament to build a strong character because we want to feel good about ourselves.
Those changes will reflect how we look. Yes, we will change, but the desire to do so will stem from within, from ourselves as a way of self-expression. Since we are expressing who we are, we won’t have the urge to buy new things every time the latest item hits the market except that it aligns with who we are.
And that’s how we save money when we practice self-acceptance. Someone who doesn’t accept themselves will buy everything they see advertised because they will want to be on, aligned with the latest fashion, or buy the brand new device.
You are amazing as you are. Don’t let someone else convince you against that. You are a gift to this world. Nobody else can be you, and that’s your superpower. Build a good relationship with yourself, be proud of who you are, and tell yourself this truth: I am great!
Once you connect with that feeling, you won’t need to spend a dime on something you don’t need to feel accepted. As you accept yourself, people will accept you… genuinely.
Have a great day. Thanks!